A joke for us men:

What do women and shotguns have in common?
Both can be bend in the middle and loaded from behind.

I'll see myself out...

An old blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake and
he finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels.

After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
(the bar immediately falls absolutely silent)

In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
"Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:

1) The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2) The bouncer is a blonde female cop with a 'baton.'
3) I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt combat Hapkido.
4) The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.
5) The lady to your right is blonde and a champion professional wrestler.

Now, think about it seriously, Cowboy... Do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?"

The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, "No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times...

One day all the animals in the forest decided to build a toilet, and pretty soon they had a little wooden cabin with a couple of high windows and a shelf for the pine-scented toilet paper, and for several weeks everything went well and everyone was really happy.

Then one day one of the windows was broken, and there was broken glass outside the cabin for some reason, and the toilet committee rounded up every animal they could find and said "does anyone know who did this?"

"I know," said the rabbit. "I'd just come in, and the bear had just got through taking a dump, and there was no pine-scented toilet paper on the shelf, so he grabbed me and wiped his ass with me, then threw me out through the window, which was closed at the time."

So the committee got the window repaired and arranged to keep the toilet paper topped up, and all was well for a few weeks more and everyone was really happy.

Then once again there was a broken window and another enquiry.

And the squirrel said, "I know what happened. I'd just come in, and the bear had just got through taking a dump, and there was no pine-scented toilet paper on the shelf, so he grabbed me and wiped his ass with me, then threw me out through the window, which was closed at the time."

So the committee got the window repaired and arranged to keep the toilet paper topped up, and all was well for a few weeks more and everyone was really happy.

Then a few weeks later the entire cabin was demolished as though dynamite had gone off inside, and the toilet committee rounded up every animal they could find and said "does anyone know who did this?"

"...I might know something," said the hedgehog.